Dreaming is supposed to be pleasant, isn’t it? At least that is what I thought. It may have started after seeing “Little Red Riding Hood” with my mom at a local theater. Later, she laughingly told me that I had hidden under the seat after the wolf appeared and had remained there for the duration of the movie. Nonetheless, the dreams were terrifying. Chased by a pack of ravenous wolves, I would run, only to be overcome. Their teeth would tear me apart, bit by bit, and every bite would be felt. I would wake screaming. These dreams continued for years, and mom, being the person she was, would often stand at the bottom of the stairs and howl, and there would be one scared, shaking daughter. I slept in the upstairs room which was my refuge, supposedly. Funny now, not so, then.
When I moved away, after graduating college, the dreams lessened, although every now and then, one would creep in leaving me shaking. Then one night, for no apparent reason, the dream was quite different and rewarding. As I opened the front door, standing here in a suit and hat with a bouquet of flowers and a box of candy was a wolf. No more frightening dreams after that. I became enamored with wolves, learning everything I could about them.
Now that I am much older, I can look back with a smile at what frightened me so badly when young. Recalling the morning a few years ago, when I looked out my window…a large white wolf was in our neighborhood, walking through as if he/she owned every inch, sniffing the wind and pausing to inspect a clump of bushes. A truly gorgeous creature, it took no notice of the insignificant human, and continued on its way.
And most recently, a few nights ago, half asleep, getting a drink of water… a sudden vision of a white wolf, only the head, with wise eyes. Appearing in the blackness, it said something odd… “We will be together soon.”
There has to be a connection somehow….from the dreams when small, to the liberating one when older, to the sighting, and finally to the vision. Was I a wolf in a past life? No answers come, but I feel as though the wolf is my spirit animal, having been with me all my life.